Frameworks / What Am I Carrying?

What Am I Carrying?

There's only one question underneath all the exhaustion, and it has two halves: what belongs to me — and what doesn't? Most high-capacity people have never been asked to sort it. So they carry all of it.

The framework
Mine.My voice. My energy. My purpose. The things that are actually mine to tend — and the only things I can.
Not mine.Other people's choices. Other people's growth. Other people's healing. The things I was never meant to carry — no matter how capable I am of holding them.
I don't have to hold everything together anymore. I have to place myself where my gifts do the most good, and let everything else find its own footing.
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How it shows up

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Questions

Asked & answered.

What does 'what am I carrying' mean?It's a diagnostic question that sorts your load into two piles — what's actually yours (your voice, energy, and purpose) and what isn't (other people's choices, growth, and healing). Naming the difference is the first step to setting the second pile down.
How do I know what's mine to carry and what isn't?Ask whether you can actually control or own it. Your choices, energy, and purpose are yours. Other people's reactions, growth, and outcomes are not — even when you're fully capable of carrying them for a while.
How do I stop feeling responsible for everyone?Start by sorting: name what's yours and what isn't, out loud or on paper. You can't put down a weight you haven't admitted you're carrying. The free scorecard walks you through the sort.
The other frameworks

Keep going.

The Human Cost of Competence  ·  Carrying vs. Caring  ·  Women Who Became Infrastructure  ·  Cultivating vs. Controlling

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